18 Hours

It’s 07:39 on Monday morning. I’m standing in my kitchen because that is the only place wi-fi seems to work. I have just realized Christmas is done – Along with opening presents, good-will and cheer. The faces of the new year are slowly taking shape. It’s almost as if the dawning of stress from days that are yet to come have inverted the festive cheer and slightly twisted some people’s smiles. This year has been crazy; filled to the brim with dualities and I can’t help but reflect on the significance of some of the things I have observed, experienced and learned. For Christmas I got my notebook to scribble down my thoughts, and over the past two days I have been reflecting and scribbling. This is my final post for this year, 2013. This is me letting go and appreciating all the year had to offer. This year went by so fast – in a blink of an eye, but I learned my lessons. Enjoy the hours that are left in this year and allow me to share how I saw these past months…

18 Hours

1.
I saw ideas grow like trees;
giving breath to life and supporting the living.

2.
I saw life as an ocean and myself as a library.
I saw the new year as a sunrise
but at the time I was too asleep to appreciate it.

3.
I witnessed intentions like a flame igniting wicks.
I also saw careless flames melt candles and set fire to curtains
reducing mansions to dying cinders,
but sometimes tears are stronger than fire
lifting the Phoenix from out our ashes.

4.
I learned angels can sometimes fall
and humans are able to carry them.

5.
I realized will is stronger than cancer
and souls are brighter than the shadows of love.

6.
I found expression was a direct telephone line to God;
He doesn’t speak human – so many hang-up -
but I find myself on the phone more often.

7.
I learned drum beats do more than keep melodies together
they are universes themselves
and they are waiting to be painted.

8.
I discovered how to let roses be
and how to appreciate them;
thorns and all,
because they don’t have to be plucked to be admired.

9.
I learned grey skies can block out the sun
but the rain it sometimes brings can cleanse the heaviness of souls.

10.
I discovered a half glass of water can eventually become the heaviest of burdens
and all I had to do was put it down.

11.
There were times I felt like Atlas
struggling to hold up the celestial sphere
but I saw angels and their wings beating for my heart
and the world didn’t seem so heavy.

12.
My heart was an actor
it played the role of a mirror.
Love was the sharpest of arrows and when it was released
it shattered my mirror into a thousand different pieces.
But I realized it still reflected and as I leaned in over the floor where it lay -
I found myself.

13.
I struggled to find the keys to unlock this cage
and when I found it,
I left its doors wide open,
even though the wind sometimes blows it closed.

14.
I saw expectation murder hope.
I forgave it and let it go.
My hope still lives from beyond the grave
like a ghost haunting my life.

15.
I saw egos as gardens and learned:
Some humans keep them tidy and beautiful,
others don’t.

16.
I saw words as more than merely letters
and sentences more than these words.
They were ancient pin pricks of light
like stars piercing the blanket of night,
making it more than just heavy but beautiful too.

17.
I observed seasons in everything;
from harsh stormy winters to beautiful lush summers
and depending where one is located in life,
we sometimes see winters all year-long.

18.
I felt this year was a day.
Every two hours – a month.
I slept for at least six of those hours,
but I’m awake now.
I saw the hours for what they were
and now I await for a beautiful sunrise.

Wishing you ALL a happy safe New Year. Although your year may have been incredibly shite, reflect on what you have experienced and hopefully you can take away something positive from the negative. Remember that truth is a bigger duality and we are often too small to see it, we get glimpses and slices which we see as good or bad. There is no right and wrong, only lessons and I do hope you have all learned yours. All the best for 2014.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!