“Toxic Masculinity” Is a Toxic Fiction; “Stop Blaming Men,” Says Author

By Selwyn Duke

Overlapping with the “Enlightenment” and a reaction to it, the lesser-known “Romantic Period” (1790-1850, supposedly) stressed not reason but emotionalism and involved the exaltation of women. Over time this spirit metastasized into an attendant demonization of men; thus do we hear today about “toxic masculinity.” But this is essentially a toxic lie, says an author and life coach, pushed by media and other forces that portray men as society’s “bad guys.”

Lack of Authentic Masculinity

In fact, says Michael Taylor, male “problems” are actually the result of the man “not being connected to his authentic masculinity.” But while Taylor takes on the spirit of our time, is he, like most moderns, losing sight of the timeless?

Fox News reports on the story:

Taylor, the author of “Stop Blaming Men for All the Problems,” told Fox News Digital that he wants to dispel the idea that toxic masculinity exists.

“People confuse toxic masculinity with toxic behaviors,” Taylor said. “So a man commits rape, domestic abuse, all those types of things. That’s not toxic masculinity. That’s a toxic behavior and I will assert that that behavior is the result of the man not being connected to his authentic masculinity.”

In his view, authentic masculinity requires men to harness the tools and emotional awareness to avoid engaging in those types of toxic behaviors. According to Taylor, movies, music and other forms of mass media influence individual beliefs. It is, therefore, up to men to challenge them, he said.

“If you look at mainstream media news especially. There is so much negativity out there, and when we look at all the stories of infidelity and corporate greed and it appears that men are the bad guys,” he said.

“Truth be told, we do perpetuate a lot of the stuff that we see in mainstream media. That’s true. But at the same time, I don’t think men are the problem.

This is all well and good and is contrary to current fashions. But then Taylor explained what he believed the issue was. “I think men being trapped in an antiquated paradigm of masculinity is the problem,” he told Fox. Is this really true, however? Is it a matter of old vs. new ideas?

Male Sins More Overt, Not More Dangerous

Or is the real problem a lack of eternal ideas?

Before getting to that, there’s a truth here hiding in plain sight. Yes, insofar as the sexes’ characteristic sins go, male ones are more overt and hence attract more attention. (E.g., a little boy’s volcanic but short-lived tantrum is more obvious than his sister’s vindictiveness-born, longer-term simmer of spitefulness.) This doesn’t make them more dangerous. Yet even more significantly and as Abe Lincoln observed, “Those who look for the bad in people will surely find it.”

That is, men are certainly responsible for most of the direct murder, virtually all forcible rape, and the majority of the violent crime generally. And, having governed civilization historically, they have prosecuted almost all history’s wars.

Male Accomplishments

It’s also true, however, that men are virtually all those who rush to crime scenes, forest fires, flood areas, and other danger zones to save lives. This and the fact that they perform almost every perilous, dirty job is why men constitute 92 percent of workplace deaths.

More significantly still, almost exclusively male endeavor has created the science, medicine, and other modern wonders that have saved literally billions of lives. It has caused the average life expectancy to rise from 33 in Paleolithic times to 78 (in the U.S.) today. It has also enabled women to outlive men, whereas the reverse was true in much earlier ages. These advances are why we have an eight-billion strong world population now — which, mind you, can only be sustained with the resources (e.g., modern food-production and water-delivery methods) male endeavor has provided. In other words, that “antiquated” masculinity has brought many benefits.

Is Emotional Connection the Answer?

This said, there’s always room for improvement. So what does Taylor prescribe?

“He encourages men to connect emotionally and break away from the stereotype of just providing and protecting,” wrote WJBF Augusta last month. “‘We go out and try to buy things for our kids that we didn’t have, but what kids really want from us more than anything is connection,’ Taylor shared.”

“He believes this emotional awareness can lead to healthier relationships and better mental health,” the news outlet continued.

Of course, connecting with people is important, and almost no one (except for Jesse Lee Peterson, perhaps) would say a man should be like Star Trek’s Mr. Spock. Yet focusing on “emotion” is still a modern, Romantic Period (which I believe never ended) idea; the implication often is, too, that men need to become more like women. But the Truth is this:

Men and women need to become more like God.

Cultivate the Virtues

As to this, required are those eternal ideas. In particular, we don’t need new (or old) “paradigms” but this: the virtues.

Virtues are “objectively good moral habits,” with examples being Faith, Hope, Honesty, Charity, Fortitude, Justice, Temperance, Prudence, Chastity, Diligence, Patience, Kindness, Forgiveness, Humility, and Love.

Cultivate them and you’ll have that “connection” with those close to you, for this is what embodying Honesty, Charity, Patience, Kindness, Forgiveness, Humility, and Love fosters. Or consider an “illusion” Taylor warns men not to fall victim to: that you must use “sexual conquest” to prove yourself. The virtue of Chastity, defined ages ago, precludes this attitude.

Just as you only become good at golf by learning the game’s principles and cultivating them in yourself, the same is true of morality: Only understanding its principles, the virtues, and cultivating them enables you to become good “at being a person.”

It is this way, and only this way, that you become a real man.

For those interested, a recent short interview with Michael Taylor is below.

                This article was originally published at The New American.