First They Came For the Sheep, and I Did Not Speak Out…

Originally published via Armageddon Prose:

“First they came for the sheep
And I did not speak out because I’m not a sheep
Then they came for the ponies
And I did not speak out because I’m not a pony
Then they came for my daughter
And I did not speak out because it was proper reparations for colonialism
And then they came for me”
-European proverb

PETA, eat your heart out!

Via Remix News:
“A 19-year-old Afghan national has been arrested and charged following a series of brutal sexual attacks on goats and sheep in Pennes-Mirabeau, a municipality in Bouches-du-Rhône, near Marseille.

The suspect was taken into custody by the anti-crime brigade (BAC) on the night of April 9-10, 2026, after local sheep and goat owners alerted police. Since early 2026, several owners had discovered their animals injured, with incidents reported in both February and March. The animals had their legs tied and showed clear signs of rape, according to French newspaper La Provence.

After multiple similar episodes, the owners installed motion-sensor cameras on their properties in an attempt to identify the perpetrator. The footage revealed the silhouette of a young man visiting their livestock at night, and the images were handed over to police, who were eventually able to identify a matching suspect.”

Related: Afghan Migrant Sexually Assaults Incapacitated German Teen on Subway Platform ‘for Hours’

Frankly, I don’t understand why this love story should provoke xenophobic outrage I’ve seen in response on social media.

What’s the big deal?

So we’ve got some raped sheep and a few goats with PTSD.

To quote Her Grace Hillary Clinton, what difference, at this point, does it make?

Love is love, bigots.

What it sounds like to me happened is that those sheep and goats got culturally enriched, were left with that glorious cultural enrichment oozing inside of them.

Should they be left with any enduring emotion about what happened in that barn during their midnight dalliance with Mohammed, it should be one of gratitude.

—————————————–

[If you appreciate Armageddon Prose, please consider a $5/month or $50/year Substack subscription or a one-time digital “coffee” donation. For alternative means of patronage, email benbartee@protonmail.com.]

——————————————

Diversity™ Is Our Strength, and if those goats can’t appreciate that, I’d say they’re in desperate need of some re-education.

Same goes for the ponies.

Continuing:

“Last year in Germany, a shocking case has emerged from the beautiful town of Oberneufnach in Bavaria, which involved a 52-year-old Turkish asylum seeker allegedly breaking into a stable and sexually abusing ponies.

The man, who is from a refugee shelter in the nearby town of Anhofen, was arrested after he was caught on surveillance video.

The man broke into the horse farm at 6:45 p.m. while the family was having dinner. They heard the dog barking and then looked on surveillance monitors, where they saw the man in the stable with his pants down on top of one of the animals.

The boyfriend then ran to the stables to chase down the man, but he had already fled the scene. He continued his pursuit of the suspect though and eventually caught him. Police arrived and placed the man under arrest.

In 2023, a 27-year-old suspect was arrested after he was caught on a surveillance camera raping a pony at a stable south of Hamburg. The 18-year-old pony, which is named “Carrie,” was abused by the man at 1 a.m., with footage showing the man calmly walking onto the property and starting to attack the defenseless animal…

Even the petting zoo at the park has not been safe. In 2017, a Syrian migrant raped a pony there in front of children.

“My babysitter was out with our son in Görlitzer Park. They witnessed the man sexually assault the pony,” one woman told Berliner Morgenpost at the time. The babysitter took a photo of the man as he raped the pony and provided it to police. The migrant was banned from the petting zoo in response, but it is unclear if he was ever charged by police.”

Related: Germany: Gang Rapes Hit Record High, Up to Half Committed by Migrants

Frankly, in addition to being cause for celebration of Diversity™, if we are going to blame anyone for these “crimes,” which are really just acts of love, it’s the cold-hearted women of Europe for not allowing themselves to be raped (culturally enriched) at will on the streets.

If they just gave it up easier, the migrants wouldn’t be forced to turn to the warm embrace of the sheep and ponies as outlets for their passions.

The single military-age migrants imported en masse to Europe are only flesh and blood; they have needs, and it’s incumbent upon the human and non-human animals of the continent alike to accommodate them.

Benjamin Bartee, author of Broken English Teacher: Notes From Exile (now available in paperback), is an independent Bangkok-based American journalist with opposable thumbs.

Follow AP on X.

Subscribe (for free) to Armageddon Prose and its dystopian sister, Armageddon Safari.

Support AP’s independent journalism with a one-off, hassle-free “digital coffee” tip or Patreon.

Bitcoin public address: bc1qvq4hgnx3eu09e0m2kk5uanxnm8ljfmpefwhawv