MSNBC: You Should Root For The Edmonton Oilers Because Orange Man Bad

No one is really surprised by this from Dave Hill at MSNBC, are they? Sure, he tries to give a few other reasons to root for the Oilers, but, it’s really about TDS

Opinion | Why Americans should root for the Canadian team in the Stanley Cup Finals

Whether you’re an actual Canadian person or simply one of the roughly 10% of Americans who, like me, consider themselves diehard ice hockey fans, this week no doubt finds you largely consumed — if not full-on bedridden — by a little something I like to call Stanley Cup Fever (or La Fièvre de la Coupe Stanley as it is known to my avid French Canadian readership).

This year’s contest is a rematch of last year’s finals — with the Edmonton Oilers facing off against the defending champion Florida Panthers. There is no shortage of reasons I am rooting for the Oilers to whip the Panthers around like a bunch of rag dolls and assume their rightful place as Stanley Cup champions for the first time in 35 years — and also the first Canadian franchise to win the Cup in … wait for it … 32 years.

I insist you root for the Oilers, as well.

Insist? Really? I couldn’t care less who wins. I do not dislike either team. But, insist? Bite me. Anyhow, his first reason is that the Oilers were his favorite team growing up. Second because hockey is a cold weather sport and it’s been a long time since a Canadian team won (the 1992-1993 season, Canadians). But, that’s all window dressing

But the biggest reason, with geopolitical importance, that I would like the Oilers to beat the Panthers is that we live in a time when the actual president of the United States — whose non-White House primary residence just so happens to be a resort/ex-wife cemetery in South Florida — suggests with disturbing regularity that Canada should become the 51st state. Aside from a handful of people I will (at the risk of sounding uncharitable) call Albertan lunatics, almost no one in Canada would ever entertain the prospect of being annexed by the neighbor to the South.

In light of this, this year’s Stanley Cup is bigger than just the game of hockey, sort of like how the U.S. men’s team’s facing off against the Soviet Union in the 1980 Winter Olympics was essentially the Cold War on ice (Note to self: Write musical titled “The Cold War on Ice.”)

I wouldn’t go as far as to say that the Oilers’ winning the sacred chalice of Canada’s Game would send a message to Donald Trump, as I’m not convinced he is capable of receiving such things. But I do think it would upset him. And I really like that idea.

He likes it so much that he makes up words

“The once great sport of hockey has been ruined by the foreigners of Edmonton, who are not very nice,” the president might say. “Brave men on very cold water, ice they call it, with knives strapped to their feet … not butter knives but more like steak knives that you would use to eat Trump Steaks … not that you would even need a knife to eat a Trump steak, because they were very tender, very tender, almost like liquid meat, many people have said, including chef Guy Fieri, who is a great friend, but the nasty Canadian Oilers will never know because they, just like my son Eric, will never be invited to the White House, this much I can tell you.”

“Also hockey is canceled in Florida. Your tax dollars will not pay for Brad Marchand any longer. One more thing: If global warming is real, then why is there ice inside the arena?”

Go, Canada. Go, Oilers.

Just straight moonbattery. Category 5. Real hockey fans do not care if it is an American team or Canadian team. It’s all based on the teams playing. If the Rangers or Flyers or Bruins were playing the Oilers, I’d root for the Oilers. If the Ducks were playing the Maple Leafs, I’d root for the Ducks, not because they are Canadian, but, really, who doesn’t like to see the Leafs fail (except Leafs fans) with the call of “this is our year”, much like we like seeing the Cowboys yearly collapse? But, the Trump Deranged live in a wackadoodle world, you know.

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