In my fun retirement job being an UBER driver, I picked up a rider on Valentines Day. I find great purpose in asking each rider how their life is going…Kind of a way to get right to the point, to see if I can be of assistance. Always, as if on cue, immediately they share their problems, and the hardships that they are going through.

This rider on this day was a young woman, married for 4 years. Her dilemma… “My husband never gives me flowers!” From a guy’s perspective, I thought that I might be so bold as to explain her husband.

“Let me try to describe your husband; would you like for me to give it a shot? He’s in charge of your finances at home. He pays the bills. He’s very frugal in spending money. He also does not see the value in buying flowers for you because they are such a waste of money. He knows too well that it is only a matter of days until they end up in the garbage. He probably buys you gifts like a shirt, or something that you can use. Am I close?” She grinned and said, “Sounds like you know my husband.”

Ladies, if you are reading this, there is some value in you knowing a few things about the way that guys think. (I know this post is for the guys… we’ll get there in a minute).

Most guys are practical. I have described their logic above. Not receiving flowers has nothing to do with the lack of love that a guy has for you. Even though you might see it as the lack of love, it has nothing to do with love in his mind. He feels as if he is protecting you from such “foolishness.”

Stick with me here. Let’s zoom out for just a moment.  Because of him, and his frugalness, he has kept you from living a life that is plagued with repossessions, bad debt, and not having the essentials in life to care for you and your family. He is simply trying to help your family live within your means. We guys see this as our responsibility.

Now, back to the guys, and the purpose of this post. Guys, let me share a secret with you… Bro to Bro.

Looking at buying flowers for your lady is not a “wise” financial decision… However, it is an investment in your happiness and a successful marriage. Just for a moment, I would like for you to see this act through the eyes of your “sweetheart.”

Women like romance. They are also nurtured through acts that contribute towards their sense of love, stability, and the knowledge that we as guys are still attracted to them. This is a very big part of their happiness.

The importance of women receiving flowers on Valentine’s Day, Birthdays, etc. isn’t just about the flowers themselves—it’s about what they represent. Here are some key reasons why it matters:

1. Expression of Love & Appreciation – Flowers are a timeless way to say, “I love you” or “I appreciate you.” They symbolize thoughtfulness and effort, making a woman feel valued.
2. Tradition & Romance – Valentine’s Day has long been associated with romantic gestures, and flowers, especially roses, carry a deep emotional and historical significance in expressing love.
3. Emotional Impact – Studies show that receiving flowers can boost happiness, reduce stress, and create feelings of warmth and affection. It’s a simple but powerful way to lift someone’s mood.
4. Feeling Special & Cherished – On a day where love and relationships are celebrated, receiving flowers reassures a woman that she is important and thought of.
5. Symbolism of Beauty & Growth – Flowers reflect beauty, life, and care, just like relationships. Giving flowers can symbolize nurturing love and appreciation for the person receiving them.
6. Social & Cultural Expectations – While not every woman expects flowers, for many, it’s a meaningful part of the Valentine’s experience that aligns with cultural norms and romantic traditions.

That being said, the most important thing is to understand what makes your loved one feel special. Some women may prefer different gestures—handwritten notes, quality time, or acts of service. The key is making her feel loved in a way that matters to her.

If your lady has mentioned that she has been disappointed because she never receives flowers, consider giving them to her on the next occasion in her life…and do it as an experiment. =)

Rather than focus on the money that you will spend, see this act as a way to tell her that she is beautiful, and means something to you. I know that you change the oil in her car, but this is something different. See this act as a message of love that you can’t live without her. It’s a way to show her that she is special to you, In A Way That She Will Understand. She will see it as the “Most awesome thing that you have ever done for her.”

Here’s another closely guarded secret. If you really want to hit a home run, have the flowers delivered to her work, or home. When she receives flowers surrounded by others, she will feel like the Princess in the room. As the delivery person brings them into the business, ALL women will be hoping… desperately hoping, that those flowers are for them. When they call out your lady’s name, she will feel a gush of pride, happiness, and euphoria. And all of the other girls whose name was not called, will have a sense of feeling unloved, and question why they married their guy in the first place.

Now, wouldn’t you want your girl to feel that way? And especially because of something that you did?

Would you like to be the kid never chosen, or chosen last, to play on a neighborhood basketball game? Well, this is how women feel who never have their name called out when flowers are delivered. The feel rejected BY YOU, and devalued, and worthless… all because of something that you didn’t do.

You don’t have to spend hundreds of dollars on flowers, unless you are in big trouble. If you know her favorite flower, make sure that it’s included in your bundle, this will score additional points. It is all about the experience that makes it so special.

Ok, back to more guy talk that you ladies might not like. Flower delivery to your sweetheart should only be done occasionally. If you were to do this every week, you are NOW just wasting your money, and you know how she is when she gets spoiled?? This that are done routinely seem to lose some of their thunder. Still continue the nice gestures, just mix it up a bit.

So, you have participated in this experiment, and now it’s time to evaluate your investment. How did she respond? As she returned from work after receiving her flowers, what did she say to you? Did you get a hug? A Kiss? Or… did you get body-slammed on the couch? How did that make her feel about you, and her self-worth? Can you see a different sparkle in her eyes? What else did you notice about her, and YOU?

One of our responsibilities in a marriage is to build up our spouse, and increase their self-worth. Did this simple act of giving flowers contribute towards your efforts to see that this was happening to her?

I will tell all of you, on both sides, that when your spouse does something that really makes a difference in the way that you feel about yourself, be sure that he/she is rewarded through your words of appreciation, and jesters of love. When you do not respond in this manner, that person will shy away from doing kind things for you. We guys need an occasional “atta-boy,” in order to keep doing kind things. Right or wrong, that’s just how we are wired.

One last thought. Ladies, we honestly can not read your mind. Seriously! The phrase, “If he loved me, he would know what I want for my birthday.” We love you, and we have No Idea what you want for your birthday!” If you don’t tell us, chances are you will get a sexy nighty… AGAIN.

Be open in your discussions. Tell each other what you would like from the other person. Are you aware that men and women think differently? We do!! Without communication it is left to each of us to determine what you would like. Let’s eliminate the guess work and be honest with each other. This one thing can eliminate some of the drama that seems to pop up each year.

So, I would like to conclude this post by offering a guarantee, a warranty if you will. I promise that if your lady has seldom received flowers, and she has dropped hints that she wishes that she would get them once in a while… If you have flowers delivered to her work, I PROMISE that will finally see the happiness in that moment that you have been looking for a long time.

Both of you continue with the giving of “surprises” of love, for you will see the power that they have in contributing towards a happy marriage.

I am excited for this to happen to you, and as always, would love a response back to tell me how things went.